March 22nd, 2008 by Cy
Two A’s birthday party was today. Sarie and I spent all night last night preparing for the big party. Not only had Two A’s invited adult friends who love him, but of course his little buddies too.
I love my little nephew Two A’s. He’s pooped out in bed right now, waiting to watch “Finding Nemo” with me. For him, it was an AWESOME day! Mommy had to go to work after the party. She’s just left, perhaps thirty minutes ago. Miss Anne is in her room recuperating as well. I’ve just finished cleaning up after the massive set up of food and decorations we planned for my nephew and his guests. Homemade fruit salad, “Pigs in a blanket”(lil’ smokie links in crescent rolls) Hebrew National BBQ’ed Hot Dogs for adults, My famous homemade macaroni and cheese, my infamous Secret Potato salad, homemade dip, chips, veggie trays, all the side dishes, and of course homemade birthday punch, lemonade, apple juice, water, milk and Birthday cake.
The sun was brilliant and bright and warming. The breeze cooled us just enough to make the day totally perfect weather wise. Guest’s marveled at the food. They mingled throughout the freshly and spotlessly cleaned house. The kids played in the bedroom, the living room, outside, and all around us. Sarie got to talk with her adult friends, and I enjoyed listening to the party guests discussing all sorts of topics – but mostly, I watched the boys.
Two A’s had three little friends over today. E. who is 5, A who is 4, and P who is 3. The house was filled with little boy laughter. Lovely, sweet, wild, daring and devious little boy laughter.
Even as I kept preparing the last minute “hot” foods, I’d excuse myself through the crowd of chattering adults and go seek out the boys. Matchbox cars were flying across carpet roads, and sticks were used as swords until I crazily told them “oh noooooooooooooo you do not – no eyeball losing today guys” *grin*
Grass was dragged in by the bottom of little boy feet, and leaves blew in through the back door, floating in as uninvited but oh so welcomed guests.
“Look Aunt Wiffie,” Two A’s says to me as he holds one to the light. “I can see thru it!”
I look. I rub his back, I see the beauty in the dirty old leaf.
“Miss Lithie, LOOK – it’s a ugly bug” E. says as he pulls from his pocket an earwig. “He will pinch you lithie so I will put him back okay?”
“Thank you E. I don’t want to be pinched.” I say as i lightly allow my fingers to run through his hair as he races by.
A. is shy. He watches me, he grins sometimes, finally a tug on my pants. “Can I have some?” he asks as he points to the red, sherbert and 7-up punch. With a big grin I pour him a full cup.
“Course you can A. I made it for you!”
I know….. semmlessly boring description of things that occur at little boy parties all the time. The adults mingled. A number of them who know Kim and John say to me in passing, “Oh so you are the nanny”. Adults in the room look at me and laugh. The crazy, dingbatted Lithie – a nanny?????? I can see in some eyes a skepticism about John and Kim’s asking me to stay and help with their soon to be born baby. One male guest says to me – “Why don’t you just have your own kids?”
“I did,” I say with a small smile. “They and my nanny were killed by a drunk driver almost nine years ago.”
His face falls. His eyes get that glossy look every parent gets when they hear me confess that. He offers his sorrow. i tell him thanks. I go back to working in the kitchen or watching the beautiful little boys.
Hours go by. We have lunch, people eat their fill. Adults marvel at how every kid actually ate lunch and didn’t just whine for junk until cake was served. I snicker to myself – little boys I know well………. I knew what I was doing when I suggested the food we had to Sarie. We open presents. Two A’s is sooooooooooo grateful. He screams “YEAH” as he gets hotwheels and other marvelous litttle boy toys. he runs to the gift giver and hugs them sincerely. His birthday is awesome and he is loving it.
We have cake – we sing happy birthday and A. and P. are very good boys and do not blow out Two A’s candles – just as their mommy told them not too. I tell A and P. how proud of them I am for listening. They grin. P. pinches my fingers and says “I like you”.
On and on I could bore you with moments, teeny tiny moments I had today with four little boys. I watched as parents were able to stop watching their own children and converse – because Lithie was always keeping an eye on the boys. At the end of the day, when parents begin telling children it is time to go, they boys – well…….. they don’t wanna go. They playing hard, they are having a good time. I go in and convince them they need to do as their parent says. out the front the door I lead them. Sarie is telling Two A’s to go say goodbye to his guest. Two A’s who is exuasted, is stumbling along. All the boys are exhausted and as we get into the grass and I instruct them not to go near the road – I turn to see no parents with me. Sarie is in the hall, walking out behind where Two A’s came from – but no parents outside.
NOW the boys are all mine. Instantly I jump on the opportunity. “Okay okay, lets line up, Two a’s here, E. You stand here, A and P, come on guys stand right here and stay.”
I back away – across the grass as i speak to eager eyes. “You guys ever play red light green light?”
Little heads shake no. I grin – MASSIVELY. Quickly i explain the rules, when i scream greenlight they run towards me, when i scream red light – they stop in place. Basically it’s a race. They are bouncing with excitement now.
“Green light”
Boys leap off their feet. Little P. takes a few seconds longer then the bigger boys, but he too is running like mad now.
“Red Light” i scream when they are only 1- 2 feet from me. They quiver with excitment. They are waiting for it and I can’t help but laugh – because I am about to be mauled.
“GREEN LIGHT” – Almost immediatly I am mauled by four little boys that are hooting and hollering and having a beautiful breeze blow in their little hair. They are laughing, I’m trying to tickle them. They’re putting their hands on me and suddenly i recall that little boy hands – when playing this game often hit you smakc dab in the boob. HAHAHHA it hurts like hell, but I can’t help but to laugh.
“Okay okay – you got me – Line up again!!!”
The boys run back to the line. I stay in position and we play one last time. This time – the mauling is far worse. HAHHAHAHAHA Little boys, what can I say?
Finally – parents get kids in cars and the hosue goes quiet. Two A’s gets bathed by mommy. Sarie and I slowly begin clean up – but after two a’s bath, sarie had to get ready to go to work. This was to be her weekend off, but the store she works in mandated everyone work today for tomorrow is easter. She is hating having to leave. She thanks me over and over for a great party – but no thanks are needed. She leaves, I clean, Two A’s is watching Scooby doo, and finally – now – I sit.
In this silence, this quiet, this clean – the tears come to my eyes. Kenny Chesney’s song comes into my mind and I glance over at the tiny table where one last, remaining party hat is sitting in the sun and the evening time shadows. I grab my camera and snap the pic as the song plays in my mind…..
Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
I feel you everywhere I go.
I see your smile, I see your face,
I hear you laughin’ in the rain.
I still can’t believe you’re gone.
It ain’t fair: you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I’ve been through,
Just knowin’ no-one could take your place.
An’ sometimes I wonder,
Who’d you be today?
Would you see the world? Would you chase your dreams?
Settle down with a family,
I wonder what would you name your babies?
Some days the sky’s so blue,
I feel like I can talk to you,
An’ I know it might sound crazy.
It ain’t fair: you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I’ve been through,
Just knowin’ no-one could take your place.
An’ sometimes I wonder,
Who you’d be today?”
and for one small moment in time my heart screams to the universe – “WHYYYYYYYYYY???????”
Then, I stand up, come to this pc and type this post……………….
I know why………. why were my boys taken? Why do parents sometimes forget to hold every. single. moment. with their child as sacred?………. Why?????????????????????????
Why Not – Right?
people ask why I do so much for kids I know? because I hope and pray none of you E.V.E.R. know the shadows of love like you see above in the picture…………..
Happiest Birthday Two A’s. Thank you for a truly beautiful day. It was sacred !!!!
w00t
The Bonsai Gear Clock you see on the left is absolutely the very best image representative of my upcoming choices and new year plans. In fact it is so utterly perfect for how I view my life and the upcoming year, I’d almost buy it…. *sigh*
Yes, yes it sings to me. Instead of being indicative of time ticking past, the gears and tiny Bonsai like structure show me that with time, and work – all things can happen. One notch at a time, one second of work after another, and soon enough something of substance and form arises from that work. I love this little Bonsai Gear Clock.
