Why Not – Right? » 2006

I’m still alive – and mostly guilty – SHIT!

October 20th, 2006 by C.A. Dubois

Â» Guilty or Not Guilty Meme Â«

Stolen from Sarie because she is my best friend and therefore I can steal from her. This is called the Guilty or Not Guilty Meme of course I am supposed to answer “Guilty” or “Not Guilty” after each question…….. yeah well….. I may adlib on each question if I see need for clarification……because I can! so on with the meme…….

1. Dated outside your race? Not Guilty – I am human, everyone I dated was human. I dated no beasts, fowl, reptiles or aquatic lifeforms. I am NOT GUILTY
2. Singing in the shower? Guilty – Sing, hell I perfom Broadway musicals in my shower. Except CATS – that just is not a shower musical – ya know?
3. Spit in someone’s drink? So Majorly Guilty I should fry in the chair. Yep you read it here folks. If I have ever stated to your face I did not like you…I ASSURE YOU, I spit in your drink at least once-ish……heeeheeeheee
4. Played with Barbies? Hmmmm….this is a tricky answer. My mother bought me Barbie’s for every christmas……I HATE BARBIE…..as such, I would rip off her purty head, each arm and each leg and then use the arms and legs as windchime dinglie things….placing her head or torso as the center knocker of the windchimes and then I hung them from my pink and white checked canopy bed (which I also hated) SOOOOOO….is that “playing with barbie” or torturing her? I plead: NO CONTEST
5. Made someone cry? Guilty in ways you have yet to envision.
6. Opened your Christmas presents early? NO CONTEST – you see I used the time zones of the world and soon as it turned “Christmas” in the first place on this earth…I open shit……is it Christmas time where I am at when opening- technically no -
7. Lied to a friend? GUILTY
8. Watched and cried while watching a soap opera? Guilty – I cried over the stupidty of such shows and their intense ruining of my day!
9. Played a computer game for more than 5 hours? Define Game— does WAR count? If so then GUILTY
10. Ran through the sprinklers naked? BUTT ASS NEKKID GUILTY- and let me tell you…after a good dousing with the sprinklers during the blowing bubbles war – it is a bitchin trying to get a bubble to land on your nippl….nevermind
11. Ate food that fell on the floor? PEOPLE – I been eating food that fell in sand – GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY -
12. Went outside naked? Not guilty. I was outside, stripped nekkid and THEN Went INSIDE – is that clear?
13. Been on stage? Guilty too many times over.
14. Been on stage naked or close to it? Hell YES – remember I used to topless dance?? AHEM – Guilty
15. Been in a parade? Guilty – been on more parade grounds then oh….. a clown
16. Been in a school play? GUILTY – “I’m flying…….look at me way up high suddenly here am I, I’m flying”
17. Drank beer? Does rolling my eyes indicate how guilty of that I am? Drank nearbeer too – so whadya think of that?
18. Gotten detention? NOT GUILTY – Never got detention………damn I am good
19. Been on a cruise? Totally Guilty – Been thrown off a cruise – TOTALLY GUILTY TOO
20. Broken into a house? Guilty – paranoid yet?
21. Gotten a tattoo? Gotten – given what’s the difference? GUILTY
22. Gotten piercings? GUILTY
23. Gotten into a fist fight? IT WAS TOTALLY SELF DEFENSE – That lying slimeball insisted he was a friend of mine deployed in a war zone even after I told the drunk bastard, Dude I know your faking it….GUILTY
24. Gotten into a shouting match? I never shout…. I hiss… NOT GUILTY
25. Swallowed sea/pool water? GULP – GUILTY
26. Spun yourself in circles to get dizzy on purpose? Totally busted on this one…..when you have to swagger drunkenly but you are stone cold sober and yet you want your fake swagger to look real……spin in circles….walk…… GUILTY and you may use Cyli’s secret spy tip #306 anytime you need it.
27. Laughed so hard it hurt? I never laugh – I’m in commad. Commanders do not…..HAHAHAHAHHAHA GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY
28. Tripped on your own feet? Well there is a no brainer – GUILTY
29. Cried yourself to sleep? WOW I really had to think on this one….but I think I have so I will say GUILTY
30. Cried in public? GUILTY – military funerals, moments of pride and joy – I cry
31. Thrown up in public? OH YEAH – TOTALLY – and on people’s shoes too!!!
32. Lied to your parents? Not anymore then those bastards lied to me – NO CONTEST
33. Skipped class? Does college count? NOT GUILTY – I LOVED SCHOOL
34. Cried so hard you threw up? NOT GUILTY – but now that it’s been mentioned – I am going to have to try it. THAT has got to suck